


Polaroid

by lusciouswoo



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote this while in Class, M/M, Mentioned Bang Chan, Pictures, Sad and Happy, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:35:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27382798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lusciouswoo/pseuds/lusciouswoo
Summary: Happiness. Sadness. Love. Pain. Whether it be good or bad, it was the memory that he chose to keep.A moment captures, a memory behind it.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	Polaroid

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing a Stray Kids fanfic. It's a short one-shot, I hope you enjoy!

Happiness. Sadness. Love. Pain. Whether it be good or bad, it was the memory that he chose to keep.

A moment captures, a memory behind it.

His fingertips brush over the multiple films on the wall, gazing softly at each one. It was a memory that he chose to remember. A constant reminder that he once fell in love with a boy.

A love that is unforgettable. A love that is painfully sweet. A love… that he let go.

> It was one afternoon, his freezing hands intertwining with his. A bite of snowflake fell on his nose and he smiled brightly at him as it melts on his nose.
> 
> “Isn’t it beautiful?!” He excitedly bounced in his feet, twirling around as the snow started to softly fall on him. Hyunjin smiled, raising his Polaroid camera to capture the excitement of the younger.
> 
> His eyes sparkled with interest, his bright smile shining despite the coldness of the weather. His hand stretched out like a little child picking an apple from a tree. His cheeks puffed red, a red scarf and beanie warmly contrasting.
> 
> “Yes, it’s beautiful.” He crinkled his eyes, fondness growing in his heart as he continues to watch him playfully jump around on their first winter.

Had he known that it might as well be his last winter with him, then maybe he would have captured every moment.

He could feel tears brimmed on the side of his eyes, as he stops on the particular film hanging. He softly smiled and traced his fingers with a deafening guilt consuming him.

_‘Sadness never looked good on you, but I’ll accept you because in my eyes. You’re still beautiful.’_

> They sat on the edge of the building, resting under the golden orange shade of the sky. Their hands are intertwined, looking over at the setting sun.
> 
> “It’s my fault, isn’t it?” Hyunjin looked over the boy, his eyes casted downwards with unshed tears. “I should have been there.” He cupped his cheeks, gently making him look towards him.
> 
> “Nothing is your fault, love.” He frowned, thumbing the tears that has rolled down the cheeks. “It couldn’t have been avoided. It’s not your fault.” He promises, cradling him to his chest as the boy let out a heart-wrenching sob.
> 
> He let his eyes stray away from the sky and to the younger, kissing the top of his head then pulling him tightly to let him feel that he’s always there. He’ll always be here.
> 
> “You know, if he ever saw you. He’ll tell you that you look like shit.” Jisung pulled away, wiping his eyes with the sleeves of his white sweatshirt. He sniffled, pouting at Hyunjin.
> 
> “I’ll beat his ass up.”
> 
> “He has more muscles than you, dummy.” He finally let a wide smile appear on his face and Hyunjin knew that he had to take the moment. A memory that is etched in his mind.

That day, they lost a friend. Someone that they are both close to, it both hurt them but they knew they had to move on. Chan would have wanted them to move on.

His walls are almost covered with multiple films, glittering with memories and moments he doesn’t ever want to forget. He had always love the feeling of the camera in his hands, loved taking pictures of the beautiful view.

It just turned out that his favorite view… is him. It was him that made every moment wanted to be captured.

> “Jinnie!” He whined, jumping beside Hyunjin who is silently looking over the films in his journal. “I am so irritated at him! He had shown up at work again and mocked me!” He chuckled, ruffling the brown hair of the younger.
> 
> “Calm down, sungie. Don’t let him get to you.”

It started from that. The day Jisung had met someone that he had considered as a stranger at first. Hyunjin would always hear him complain endlessly about him that, him there and he used to love hearing him rant however things took a great turn.

_‘It was you that made me view the world as flawless. It was you that had always given me motivation to pick up the camera every day with a soft smile in my lips.’_

It wasn’t always like this. They used to be so close, what made it change? It was like all their moments together never mattered, as if they have never fallen for each other.

He chose to move on, but Hyunjin hasn’t.

He choked on a sob as he picks up a certain picture. It was the last wide smile he had received from him. The last smile that is directed him instead of the camera.

It was before he confessed.

> His smile is bright like the sun rising behind him, he turned to Hyunjin with a laugh as he sees a funny meme on his phone. Hyunjin raised his camera and quickly took the picture before the smile disappeared and small pout formed on his lips.
> 
> “Ya! Why are you always taking a picture of me?” He playfully punched Hyunjin’s arm. “You like me, don’t you?” He teased, bumping Hyunjin with his fist.
> 
> “Yeah.” Hyunjin let it slip out of his mouth, his hand dropping the camera before covering his mouth with widen eyes,
> 
> “You… what?” Jisung awkwardly laughed, “It’s a joke, right?” Hyunjin gulped, letting his hand fall downward slowly.
> 
> “I do.” He closed his eyes tightly, “I really do like you.”
> 
> “Hyunjin.” He didn’t open his eyes as he hears the change of tone the younger has used. “You can’t do this to me.”
> 
> “I’m sorry.”
> 
> “Hyunjin… You know that I like someone else…”
> 
> “I know.”
> 
> “I’m sorry.” Hyunjin shook his head, “I already love him.” Hyunjin knew that he love someone else, yet he still took the chance. He had thought that maybe, maybe he would have some chance.
> 
> “It’s okay.” His shaky voice filled the tense silence, “I won’t get in the way of your happiness.” His heart broke as the warmth that engulfed faded away.

He finally picked up a photo that he had kept aside, breaking at the sight of Jisung smiling widely at the camera with his wedding suit and a shiny metal shining brightly from his ring finger.

> As he stood at the altar of the church, trembling hands soothing out the crinkles of his suit as he awaits. A soft smile appeared on his face when he let his eyes fall on the boy that he fell in love with.
> 
> He took a deep breath, raising his hand up that has his camera. He smiled, seeing Jisung smile widely to him.
> 
> “Thank you Jinnie.” He hugged him before continuing towards the boy that he fell in love waiting at him by the altar.

Hyunjin never had a chance. He promised Jisung that he won’t let himself get into his happiness. A love that he has let go.

_‘You’re happy. You’re happy and I’m okay with it even if it isn’t me.’_

His teardrops stained the film that has a picture of them together making a heart with their arms. It was their first winter, and it is also their last.

That day onwards, Hyunjin have never picked up his treasured Polaroid camera. A gift that came from Jisung, the only motivation that he has disappeared.

_‘Without you, there is no beauty in the view.’_

**Author's Note:**

> Leaving Kudos and Comments are always appreciated. Stay safe everyone!


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